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I’m watching “300” right now. It’s pretty good. I like it better than “Sin City.” In fact, I didn’t really like Sin City that much. Well… no, I did. I liked it a lot. It’s inaccurate to say that I didn’t like it as much as it is to say that I fail to see the point artistically. I gained nothing from the movies that I didn’t get from reading the comics… with the notable exception, I suppose, of there being more comics than there are movies. It was most certainly true to the books and visually interesting.

Sin City was a perfect translation of Frank Miller’s ultra-noir series. It wasn’t really an adaptation in any way. Artistically, it was pointless.

It served no purpose other than to reach a larger audience and that is, itself, a noble goal. I surely appreciate comics spreading and it is interesting to think that a new aspect of the functionality of movies is to promote literary awareness. I think we, relatively often, see a movie and say to ourselves, “that was a book?” or comic book so, again, I appreciate that aspect.

Hold on a moment… I’ve lost my train of thought.

Oh, yes… uh… in the end, Sin City was just the comic only much larger. I mean, I saw it on the IMAX, so, it was like a lot larger. Like… a lot. But, frankly, that seems pretty silly to me.

This brings me to 300 which I’m watching now. It’s nearly done, actually. They changed a great deal while remaining true to the story. Not Thucydides‘ story from the History of the Peloponesian war– that was “the 300 Spartans” with Richard Egan– but Frank Miller’s 300. It’s about over now and my only real gripe is that they haven’t mentioned Thermopylae.

But that’s the essence of adaptation.

Indulge me a moment, let’s say that we’re idealists, you readers and I (because I know that there aren’t enough idealists on staff here) and say that for the sake of argument, that art is a language. I’m not the first to say it and there are some well supported theories in favor of this statement. It’s not unlike evolution or gravity in that way. If we’re very lucky linguistics will give us an answer someday, but, I’m not holding my breath for concrete proof.

So, having said that art is language, we can say that according to linguistics, anything which can be expressed in one language can be expressed in another, but not in direct translation. At least, not if the art is well crafted or the phrase well turned. A word for word translation seldom, in the case of quality, conveys the complete idea.

In the instance of movies and comics, there are fundamental differences in the media. Yes, they both have words and pictures, and comics can be very cinematic. Superficially, they’re fairly similar. Like Latin and Italian. But comics are their own medium and, as Alan Moore said, if one takes the superficial similarities too far into comics, you just end up with movies that don’t move.

Comics uses space to approximate time and because of its “printed” nature, is designed with the capability of rereading intrinsic to it. Movies (talkies, really) occur in the same space projected onto a screen at a proscribed speed and are not intrinsically designed to be watched again at your leisure. Also, if I was unclear, they’re not designed to be watched at whichever speed you like.

Sin City doesn’t really take advantage of those comic aspects the way that 300 did. Sin City took advantage of a different aspect of comics: its ability to use iconic shapes in an incredibly evocative manner as characters.

300 really… really takes advantage of the medium of comics. Read it. You’ll see. It wouldn’t be that great as a direct translation. But as an adaptation, it was quite stirring.

And that’s the end of my show. Donk.

-Ian K.

Ian is, of course, an overanalytical pansy who’s like to be shot by the time he’s thirty by an angry human, man or woman, young or old, screaming “Just shut the fuck up so i can enjoy it!” I will not speak to the probability that this human will be me, largely because i expect to have burst forth from this mortal flesh and ascended to godhood by the time Ian is thirty. More to the point, because Ian is a horrible failure, it seems to fall to me to comment on the strip. Yes, we are in theory to do that twice a week. I happen to be a huge fan of this particular work, not only because of the terrific face chris is making in the first panel, but also because it marks a midpoint in our process; we’d come far by the time this was written and shot, though had far further to go before we’d made it to the clanking, inefficient engine of brass and will that powers our most recent endeavors. It is my hope that it is equally clear to you that read how we have come so far in what is realistically speaking a fairly short period of time, though i do not expect you to know what joys await you as our newest work will not be seen here for at least a month. Rest assured, it shall lay your feeble brainmeats low with humor content. I must rest now; Transubstantiation is tiring work.

-Mike

What Ian is trying to say is that we based this particular comic around Frank Miller’s work, you’ll notice the similarities right off the bat. For instance, Frank Miller writes comics, WE wrote a comic. Frank Miller has people in his comics, so do WE! It’s astounding how successful we have been thus far in emulating his work for our own success. This strip in particular is also a vastly complicated metaphor for the international problem of the suffering children currently enslaved by the underground mole people of the south-east. Not to be confused with…well..confusion.

As far as technical aspects of this strip, you’ll note that any shot which contains both me an Ian is done by me setting the camera to do a timer shot and then running into it. This is due to our (then) lack of a camera crew.

- Chris

Anyone else notice that “happened” is misspelled in this strip? Or is it just me? I mean I know I’m gay and all, but I’m pretty sure there are two “p’s” in “happened”. Much like there are two “p’s” in gay sex. Am I allowed to talk about gay sex?

Speaking of consecutive “p’s” my grandfather used to write “PP” on all of his grandkid’s report cards, which stood for “Proud Pa”. He passed away before I was born, but has still been one of the most influential people in my life. So, yes, consecutive “p’s” are important things to me, I guess…is what I’m trying to say…

…And here’s a picture of a sexy giraffe.
-Big Gay Mike